Nov 28, 2008

Lets wake up for ourselves


How old are u 20+, less than 30?? All the militants in the recent event are of the same age. I m sure you know what am I talking about the ‘Big terrorist attack on Mumbai’. Yes all of them are of same age and look at them how devoted they are and what level is the devotion, ready to die (even for so called religion love) But what are we doing sitting in front of The TV sets and feeling bad about the injuries and deaths, and being happy for not being one of those. But can you deny that somewhere in the corner of your mind we all have the thought ‘what if I am one of those next time?’. Can you deny the fact that everyday when you leave your house you wonder if you are going to come back or not??. Why?? Why are we living such a scared life? Why are we so numb about the things happening around us? Why are we still so quite? Just because some few people who are ready to give there lives and bomb us every now and then. Come on!! What are we waiting for?? Don’t u think so, its enough now all the conferences , meeting, all the ‘Samjhota’ and stuffs, all the neighbourhood thing.

We have been seeing so many blast in the past, which have some relation or the other with Pakistan. We have so many evidences, proofs against PAK. We all know that the root lies there. But what have we done about it? nothing. Being good isn’t helping. So why cant we stand for our own safety, for our own self and fight. Let's finish it in one go. Let's punish the ones who are responsible so bad that all the other learn a lesson.Lets show them if they don't have any mercy for the Innocent we don't have any mercy for the cruels. I m sick of this everyday scared death inside me. i want to see that fear in all the terrorist, the fear that i see in everyone of us,the fear that i feel all around. i want to make them think 100 times before they even think of next attack. And I m sure you want that too. So let's take some big action let's tell everyone what we feel.Lets punish them so hard that the world should shiver. Lets punish them the worse possible way that no one has seen before.

Let the government know what we really think? What we really want? Cos it’s the matter of our life after all….

Nov 21, 2008

TIME is d boss.

Its been quite some time now that I have been preparing for my viva, making drawings, working on my model, slogging my ass, staying up late nights, cos I had decided that I m gonna do well this time and gonna give everything good. I had vivas on two days one after d other, first day was good both d vivas went well. Second day was more important cos it was design viva the most important subject of architecture. I finished my model one day before. There was just one file which was given to my friend and I was to plot (print) that in the morning cos my friend could not email me last night and I had to wait till I get that email which for some bad reasons came to me in the morning at around 6:30am.on the viva day. I don’t know what should I call it my bad luck or bad stars d machine got stuck and I had to wait for my plot to get done which resulted in me reaching my collage late. You must be thinking right, that I must have given my viva and everything went well cos all my work was done even the model was looking good and finished too. But you are wrong, u know what happened? the jurors got pissed off cos I was late and I was marked absent even when I was there, I requested them to take it, but I guess they were not able to hear me at that time, I guess they were not able to here the pain in my voice, I guess they were not able to see the eagerness in my voice, the efforts in my work, nothing they just walked away. I was head struck at that moment and everything went blank when they walked away. All my efforts, all the work everything went into drain in fractions of seconds just because of my one mistake “I was not on time”. It felt as if it was the end of the world for me. I wanted to kill the jurars , I wanted to kill the stupid traffic, I wanted to kill that stupid computer which got stuck, I wanted to kill internet for not working on time, but I wanted to kill myself for all of this. One stupid mistake and that’s it everything got spoilt.

I have always heard some people learn it the hard way, I guess it was the worst way to learn the lesson. The lesson ill never forget ‘TO BE ON TIME’. Everything is been messy since then not able to stop cursing myself cos after all its my fault no matter what. But u know why it hurt me so much because other people who didn’t even have good quality work got chance to show. And when I had everything fished well done I didn’t even get chance to put my point across. It wouldn’t have been bad if they saw my work and didn’t like it, but I didn’t even get the chance. It hurts so bad when u lose even before u try for it. It hurts real bad.

Nov 20, 2008

its not in the system its in us..

so true!!

The President of India DR. A. P. J. Abdul Kalam 's Speech in Hyderabad . *
Why is the media here so negative?Why are we in India so embarrassed to recognize our own strengths, our achievements? We are such a great nation. We have so many amazing success stories but we refuse to acknowledge them. Why? We are the first in milk production. We are number one in Remote sensing satellites. We are the second largest producer of wheat.We are the second largest producer of rice.Look at Dr. Sudarshan , he has transferred the tribal village into a self-sustaining, self-driving unit. There are millions of such achievements but our media is only obsessed in the bad news and failures and disasters. Iwas in Tel Aviv once and I was reading the Israeli newspaper. It was the dayafter a lot of attacks and bombardments and deaths had taken place. TheHamas had struck. But the front page of the newspaper had the picture of aJewish gentleman who in five years had transformed his desert into an orchid and a granary. It was this inspiring picture that everyone woke up to. The gory details of killings, bombardments, deaths, were inside in thenewspaper, buried among other news.
In India we only read about death, sickness, terrorism, crime. Why are we so NEGATIVE? Another question: Why are we, as a nation so obsessed with foreignthings? We want foreign T. Vs, we want foreign shirts. We want foreign technology.
Why this obsession with everything imported. Do we not realize that self-respect comes with self-reliance? I was in Hyderabad giving this lecture,when a 14 year old girl asked me for my autograph. I asked her what her goal in life is. She replied: I want to live in a developed India . For her, you and I will have to build this developed India . You must proclaim. Indiais not an under-developed nation; it is a highly developed nation. Do you have 10 minutes? Allow me to come back with a vengeance.
Got 10 minutes for your country? If yes, then read; otherwise, choice isyours.YOU say that our government is inefficient.YOU say that our laws are too old. YOU say that the municipality does not pick up the garbage. YOU say that the phones don't work, the railways are a joke,The airline is the worst in the world, mails never reach their destination.YOU say that our country has been fed to the dogs and is the absolute pits.
YOU say, say and say. What do YOU do about it?Take a person on his way to Singapore . Give him a name - YOURS. Give him aface - YOURS. YOU walk out of the airport and you are at your International best. In Singapore you don't throw cigarette butts on the roads or eat in the stores. YOU are as proud of their Underground links as they are. You pay $5 (approx. Rs. 60) to drive through Orchard Road (equivalent of MahimCauseway or Pedder Road) between 5 PM and 8 PM. YOU come back to the parking lot to punch your parking ticket if you have over stayed in a restaurant or a shopping mall irrespective of your status identity... In Singapore youdon't say anything, DO YOU? YOU wouldn't dare to eat in public during Ramadan, in Dubai . YOU would not dare to go out without your head coveredin Jeddah . YOU would not dare to buy an employee of the telephone exchange in London at 10 pounds ( Rs.650) a month to, 'see to it that my STD and ISD calls are billed to someone else.'YOU would not dare to speed beyond 55 mph (88 km/h) in Washington and then tell the traffic cop,'Jaanta hai main kaun hoon (Do you know who I am?). I am so and so's son. Take your two bucks and get lost...' YOU wouldn't chuck an empty coconut shell anywhere other than the garbage pail on the beaches in Australia and NewZealand .Why don't YOU spit Paan on the streets of Tokyo ? Why don't YOU use examination jockeys or buy fake certificates in Boston ??? We are still talking of the same YOU. YOU who can respect and conform to a foreign system in other countries but cannot in your own. You who will throw papers and cigarettes on the road the moment you touch Indian ground. If you can be an involved and appreciative citizen in an alien country, why cannot you be thesame here in India ?
Once in an interview, the famous Ex-municipal commissioner of Bombay , Mr. Tinaikar , had a point to make. 'Rich people's dogs are walked on the streets to leave their affluent droppings all over the place,' he said. 'And then the same people turn around to criticize and blame the authorities for inefficiency and dirty pavements. What do they expect the officers to do? Go down with a broom every time their dog feels the pressure in his bowels?In America every dog owner has to clean up after his pet has done the job. Same in Japan . Will the Indian citizen do that here?' He's right. We go to the polls to choose a government and after that forfeit all responsibility.We sit back wanting to be pampered and expect the government to do everything for us whilst our contribution is totally negative. We expect the government to clean up but we are not going to stop chucking garbage allover the place nor are we going to stop to pick a up a stray piece of paper and throw it in the bin. We expect the railways to provide clean bathrooms but we are not going to learn the proper use of bathrooms.We want Indian Airlines and Air India to provide the best of food andtoiletries but we are not going to stop pilfering at the least opportunity. This applies even to the staff who is known not to pass on the service to the public. When it comes to burning social issues like those related towomen, dowry, girl child! and others, we make loud drawing room protestations and continue to do the reverse at home. Our excuse? 'It's the whole system which has to change, how will it matter if I alone forego mysons' rights to a dowry.' So who's going to change the system? What does a system consist of ? Very conveniently for us it consists of our neighbours, other households, other cities, other communities and thegovernment. But definitely not me and YOU. When it comes to us actually making a positive contribution to the system we lock ourselves along with our families into a safe cocoon and look into the distance at countries far away and wait for a Mr.Clean to come along & work miracles for us with a majestic sweep of his hand or we leave the country and run away. Like lazy cowards hounded by our fears we run to America to bask in their glory and praise their system. When New York becomes insecure we run to England . When England experiences unemployment, we take the next flight out to the Gulf. When the Gulf is war struck, we demand to be rescued and brought home by the Indian government. Everybody is out to abuse and rape the country. Nobody thinks of feeding the system. Our conscience is mortgaged to money.

Nov 14, 2008

what if ??

12/11/08
Being in architecture I am used to visiting places alone. Going to any place whether crowded or may be barren doesn’t really matter. I have been do dingy slums to big gardens, to big institutes this and that. But today was different, I went to sum place in Andheri, to get some material for my model. It was a small laser printing office, it was kinda inside from the road, tht I actually had to hunt for it. The area where this place is was full of godowns, wooden factories and all. I crossed a small narrow passage (gali I would say) which led to a narrow stairs and there it was on first floor. There were two guys in the office. (u would hardly find any girl in such areas) It was kind of dark cause it was around 7:00pm and the place had no windows at all. I sat there waiting for my work to get done. As u know it empty mind is devils house, one thought came to my mind. What if someone kidnaps me here then rape n kill me. My cells battery was down and no one at my place knew as to where I was exactly apart from the fact tht I had gone to get some stuff that’s it. So there was no way they would have been able to find where I was. That thought really made me insecure. I finished my work as soon as possible and got out of there. But trust me it was really scary thought, not because of anything else but specially for the thought tht what if my life ends in such a miserable way? We really don’t know how our life is going to end but what if there is something so bad stored for us as the end of our life?

Nov 7, 2008

lonesome day


Wow! Finally I m out of my house. My life has been on a slow track since almost a month now. I had my exams some days back before which I was preparing for my exams so hardly went to college, after which it was diwali vacation. And now I am preparing for my viva which is on 20th. So now u get it right how boring things are at my end for quite some time now. As I m not so domestic I hate to stay at home for very long time I start getting all irritated just sitting at home and all. So decided today that I will go to college just to relax a bit and also had some work in library.


Reached college in the noon. First thing which strike me when I was in train was it’s been a long time I have travelled in train. Frankly speaking that wasn’t a great feeling. College was empty as such cos diwali vacation is still on. So I was searching for someone from friends. Just someone who would have a smile to see me after such a long time. There were few juniors doing their study trip work, but there was no one from my class L i wasn’t expecting anyone though cos all are busy doing their thesis or there internship and this & that. Still went to my studio, went to our favourite balcony sat there for some time. It didn’t take long and I was lost in my own thoughts recollecting those fun times in that balcony, in our studio. All the crazy b’day bumps, stupid games, all the gossip columns. Some serious moments, some fights, our hour long chats on all stupid topics. Our future planning, those tasty lunches, those chocolates. Those crazy laughter, senseless jokes, leg pulling. There were n number of thought rushing in my brains. So many memories related to this college. Four years of my life, fun years of my life. Would never forget the jury days, the last moment work, let night coffee, those night outs in college, sometimes for work sometimes for time pass. Those long night walks around the college to be awake. Lying down in the lawn and planning out the work. so many memories that can’t be listed. And in the next moment I was all sad. Couldn’t sit there anymore the sense of loneliness creped inside me. And it was too much to take. The though followed by that was more scary ‘my college life is over now’. Was painful thing to realise. Had to run away from that thought so got out of the studio and went to comp lab thought of doing some time pass to change my mood. Sat in front of the comp but my mind was still stuck with that thought ‘my college is over’. It was Karan who came from behind and pulled me out of that thought. It was so good to see him. He wasn’t in town so saw him after quite some time. As he always catches my expression he asked me as to what I was on my mind. I said nothing but as always ended up telling him what was on my mind. He smiled and said ‘I wish to be in that state, out of college’. And I recollected those times when we had hell lot of work and wished to finish everything of as soon as possible and get out of college. Now when I am about to get out of college I feeling so sad. Wired isn’t it? When u have something u wish for something else and when u get that u feel past was better. Karan caught my mood and suggested to go out for lunch. Was a good idea cos I really wanted myself to get back to normal so could get back to work. We ended up going to MAC and had burger. We’re not there for long but still it helped. I don’t know weather it was burger or Karan but mood was better. I guess its karan cos he knows how to make things sounds simple. And also knows me well. I don’t know what’s with two of us we are totally different but still end up enjoy being together (at least I do.and I guess he does too) he doesn’t talk much but when he talk I have to shut up! I guess the bond which ties us together is our HYDERABAD connection. or may its cos I bug him a lot and he doesn’t mind getting bugged :P

Thanks Karan.

Happy to get out of the house today, but also would never forget today’s day. The most lonesome day ever.

Nov 6, 2008

diwali week

Hey guys hi once again.
I guess I took a little longer than what I had planned for. I will try to stick to my plans next time. :P So talking about this week it was good week because of diwali everywhere was glitter, all around lots of lamps lots, lots of sweets, and lots of new new things. So diwali was good. The fun part was on the Sunday when I met my collage friends after a real long time. The ‘FAMOUS FIVE’, that’s what I call my group as. Which includes rashmi, ritesh, vidhita, pritish and me. Remember I had told u about my life revolving around few people, yes my collage life revolves around these four cartoons. All my years in architecture have been with these guys. All of them are different and special too. I know I have to introduce each of them individually maybe some other time, would be fun to write about all of them in one go.
So coming back to the Sunday. We went for movie in the morning. Called ‘Fashion’ was a good one Madhur Bhandarkars movie quite realistic. Was good enough, went for movie after a really long time. Cos I m not a movie freak as such. Then went for a good lunch but the best part of the whole day was the evening when we went to a beach. For a change we went to the other side of the beach as in we went to a finishing village. Got to see different things than usual beach scenario. Lots and lots of fresh fishes. Was a different experience all together. The funniest part was when we decided to go a fort across the beach. We had seen lots of images of the beach and were very excited cos the beach is on a small Iceland and u have to catch a ferry to reach there. But when we saw the d boat we all had expression ‘are u kidding me’ types. Because the boat was really small and there were too many people stuffed in it, for a moment we though what if the boat topples in the middle of the sea. (Would have been fun tough in the middle of the sea, like banana-boat ride :P) So the planed got cancelled, with a promise to go to the fort next time and little early when there would be less crowd plus with some more guts. So we spent time on beach doing nothing as such but ended up having amazing photo session, some of the snaps turned out to be really good. Saw the amazing sunset one of the things I really like to do. Sitting on a beach looking at the waves, the changing colours of the sky and listening to the waves. Beach is a lovely place to spend some time quietly. So ended our get together there. Good way to spend Sunday isn’t it?
See you soon.